Unexpectedly Potty Trained

Here's my girl doing a dry run and showing her, "I'm so proud of myself face." Nicky used the potty three times yesterday and another four times this morning. Lest anyone begin admiring my potty-training skills, let me assure you I was completely taken by surprise. I had no hand in encouraging her since I have always been in the frame of mind that potty training takes place around three years old. All I did was suggest she use the potty when she kept telling me she was peeing in her diaper. Maybe this lackadaisical approach works for Nicky since she is always in a big hurry to grow up and I’m in just as much of a hurry to have her stay little. All this staying in the nursery by herself and potty training makes me feel nostalgicish for her babyness. I know just because she started to wear panties doesn’t mean she is going off to college tomorrow. However, I know every little step of independence leads in the direction of her not being my baby anymore.

Miles Levin

I guess my life must be boring this week because I can't think of anything exciting to write about. Each day is pretty much the same here with variations such as the pool, beach, or eating out to break up the monotony. I love the summer though and I love being a Mom. I know that the little phase doesn't last forever with my kids so I try to enjoy each day.

I've actually been reading a very touching blog for the last few months that reminds me to enjoy each day. An 18-year old guy name Miles Levin writes the blog. He is dying of cancer but has used his struggle to touch others with his beautiful insights into life. He writes so eloquently for someone so young and admire him so much. He really helps me appreciate my life in way that I have never appreciated it before. I will put the link to the CNN story about him in case anyone else wants to find out more. You can find the link to his blog in the story. It is heavy stuff so you might want to find some frivolity to lighten your mood afterwords. I cry every time I read his updates.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/conditions/05/09/miles.blog/index.html

Nicky Goes to Nursery Without Parental Hovering

We reached quite the milestone today quite unexpectedly. I dropped Nicky off at her nursery class and promised her I would be right back because I had to go find Jeff. When I came back and peaked in the window, she was doing just fine and playing with toys. I was outside listening and waiting for the inevitable meltdown and it never came so I went to my class. No one came for me to come sit with Nicky in the nursery. Nicky made it through the entire hour and half! Hooray! This has been almost 10 months in coming.

Other Nicky funnies:

- She helped me make brownies and kept saying, "I need your help" over and over.

-If you notice Nicky wearing the same striped shirt with flowers in every picture, it's not because we don't have any clothes for her. She has deemed this her favorite shirt and asks to wear it every day even if it is filthy. When the laundry is done, she finds it and wants to wear it again.

- She knows and can sing the entire first verse of "The Lord is My Shepherd." I guess she learned it because she overheard me practicing for my voice lesson. It is so funny to hear her say the words, "reedemed when opressed." I had no idea she knew it and then I overheard her singing yesterday.

-We had friends from the ward over for a BBQ tonight and Nicky tried to take our friend's rectal temperature with her toy thermometer. I guess she saw me do that to Andy one time and thought that is how you take everyone's temperature. How funny and embarrassing!

A Blustery Day at the Beach

We were all excited that the June gloom finally seems to be ending and summer is starting down here in San Diego. To celebrate, we decided it was high time to go to the beach and do some boogie boarding. Unfortunately, the wind was blowing so hard and it was COLD. No one dressed down or dared get into the water. Nicky played with sand and it kept blowing all over everyone around us. Andy crabbed because sand was in his eyes. We only ended up staying an hour.

Here are some fun pictures from Torrey Pines Beach.



Here's Jeff and Nicky and the poor kite that crashed from too much wind.



They are not squinting from the sunlight but the abundance of blowing sand.


Andy's fat hands showing their competency with a cup. The boy can hardly move but he is sure good at putting stuff in his mouth. (Rebecca, if you are reading...you can cut this one out to show Emily.)



And a perfect smile for a not so perfect day at the beach.

I've Got Both of YOu

Nicky gets a kick out of it when I hold her and Andy at the same time. She laughs and in her cute way of confusing her pronouns, she says, “I got both of you.” Whenever I’m holding them like that it hits hard how lucky I am to have them. It seems like yesterday that Jeff and I were sitting in doctors’ offices where we were given dire predictions about future children. I remember some of my lowest days back then wondering what my babies would look like but thinking that I might never know. My heart would ache and I wanted to somehow reach into Heaven and grab them down. It is so strange how entitled I felt to “my” babies as if it was an absolute in the universe and that God somehow owed me this blessing.

I remember the intensity of my prayers back then but I also remember knowing that not every blessing is given to every person. It was quite a learning experience and I grew up so much.

Seeing these children and hearing them now is so surreal and wonderful. In my joy, I want to memorize every day and every little look and smile they give me. I only prayed for one baby but miraculously enough, two came along. It feels like I had a pray for one, get one free deal. I am so glad I got that deal! They are both my little angels and have expanded my heart with so much love.

One of my favorite songs is, “The Lord is My Shepherd.” I love the line, “In the midst of affliction, my table is spread. With blessings unmeasured, my cup runneth over.” When I am holding 50 lbs of “both of you,” I feel the words of this song in my heart so literally. I am not sure why my prayers were answered how I wanted and others are not so fortunate. The trial of infertility is so real for so many. I feel so much compassion for those who struggle. It is so difficult. I am so grateful that God taught me a great lesson of patience and faith and gave me the gift of being the mother of two of his wonderful little people.

"Higher Boy"

Who knew that the infant swing would be of more use after the kids grew out of being small babies. $100.00 and many hopes and dreams later, Nicky's colic continued despite the new, battery-operated, green swing with hanging teddy bears and endless lullabies. Andy enjoyed the swing but could never get in it without his older sister pushing him or trying to get in with him.

So to my surprise it is quite the hit now with both kids despite the fact that they are both too big for it. When Andy is in the swing, Nicky pushes him so hard that that the whole thing almost tips over and says, "Boy want higher?" and "De happy" (for "he's happy) and "Dandy, that fun?" (Nicky's nicknames for Andy are Boy and Dandy.) After Andy is done, Nicky hops on in and swings herself even though her feet touch the floor and she is causing one of the hinges to come loose on the top. I know this plaything is an emergency room visit waiting to happen but it is sure nice to have a little free time while there is something entertaining around for both of them. They enjoy this thing for at least 20 minutes which is quite wonderful considering the usual length of their little attention spans. (Don't worry, I supervise...at least while Nicky is pushing Andy.)

Playing Dr. Ou

I don't know if other people go to the doctor as much as we do. We have had so many ear infections and re-checks at our house. There are times when we are in that office twice a week. If we go a couple of weeks without needing Dr. Ou (prounounced "O"), I seriously consider celebrating. I hope that maybe the nurse and doctor will start to forget the first name status we are under. I think the inordinate amount visits must have spurred on this crazy obsession Nicky has with Dr. Ou. "Dr. Ou" was one of Nicky's first phrases and she talks to her when we go in the office. She says, "hi Dr. Ou" and "bye bye Dr. Ou" when the doctor comes in and out of the office. At home she started pretending to call Dr. Ou on her cell phone. She says, "Dr. Ou, I'm a little bit sick. I need some medicine to feel bedder." Nicky also has an uncanny ability to know when Dr. Ou is returning a call to me. One time was particularly embarrassing because Nicky kept yelling, "I want to talk to Dr. Ou" in the background while I was on the phone with the doctor. The request kept getting more frantic and was coupled with a high pitch and crying. Dr. Ou said, "Is that Nicky?" I had to lie and tell her I told Nicky she was on the phone. I don't know why I lied. It seems ridiculous now to be so embarrassed.

So last night I took Nicky to WalMart and bought her this little doctor set. As you can see, Andy is the unwitting victim. She kept wandering around all morning with the stethoscope and "ear checker" (I don't know the clinical name) looking for him.

Is There Anything Wrong With Just Wanting to Sleep?

The above picture has nothing to do with my topic but I thought it was a cute one. I love babies in their diapers. Especially this shot of Nicky and Andy together. It is so funny how Andy almost weights the same as Nicky. But anyway, on to the real topic. Today is a day filled with a little anxiety. Andy and I are not too happy with the current arrangements. I never realized how sleep deprived a person can get and still function until I had kids. It all started last month when we decided Andy needed to sleep in his own crib. After 7 months of around the clock catering to Andy we started feeling like we deserved a full night of sleep every night. Things went rather smoothly, too smoothly, and Andy started sleeping on his own in his crib through the night after two nights of only 20 minutes of crying before bed. “This is too easy,” I told myself. Turns out it was way too easy. A couple of days later Andy got an ear infection that was resistant to his first round of antibiotics and he has not been sleeping well ever since. Today I am taking him to see Dr. Ou but I am almost positive the infection has cleared up and what is left is residual stubbornness and his knowledge that his mother is guilt-ridden pushover. The other night I let him cry for a straight half hour before I went in to find both of his fat little legs stuck in the slats of the crib. The next day at nap time I said to myself, “I’m not going to let him get to me this time.” After 40 minutes or so, I went in to find he had diarrhead himself (an effect of his antibiotics). These incidences coupled with his hoarse voice have left me feeling completely guilt-ridden. I can create a very anxiety-provoking dialogue in my head too. Whilst he is crying, I think to myself, “what if he is hungry?” “What if he has allergies?” “I’m sure he has acid reflux, he is always burping up?” “What if he’s scared?” and the list goes on.

Poor Jeff has been patiently sleeping on the air mattress for weeks hoping for a time when he can reclaim his spot in bed with me. He is so patient and good.

I don’t know why getting babies to sleep in their crib is the hardest part of mothering for me so far. I swear it raises my blood pressure to an unnatural high hearing them cry and not going to them. I feel like I am a child abuser. I see Nicky is such a good sleeper now so I know she is not psychologically damaged from her stint crying in her crib. It is so nice to just go put her down and have her go to sleep. I am hoping one day Andy will do the same. They cause anxiety. I love them so much that I never want to hear them cry.

Nicky's Last Weeks with Brynlin

Nicky's first friend is Brynlin. She and her family are moving in a few weeks to El Paso. So for the next few weeks, the two girls will be enjoying each others company for the last few times. We are so sad they are moving. Nicky gets along so well with "Brynny" and they play so cute together. They love to hold hands and and be together. Today I was watching Brynlin and Chase (her brother). When they went down for a nap, Brynlin asked if Nicky would be there when she woke up and she also asked that Nicky tuck her blankets around her. It is so sweet to watch them together.

Big Andy Sits Up!

At 8 months Andy has finally mastered the art of holding all 22 pounds of himself in an upright position. We are happy with his humble accomplishments.