If you haven’t heard, there’s a war on in California. The religious types including myself were asked to form a coalition in support of Proposition 8. A few months ago the California Supreme Court ruled that same sex marriage is legal in California. In response, Propisition 8 will now appear on November’s ballot allowing voters to reverse that decision. If “Yes” votes prevail, only marriage between a man and a woman will be recognized as valid. If it's a "No," same sex marriage will be legal. If same sex marriage remains legal, there are some worries. One worry is that LDS Social Services will be forced to allow gay marrieds to adopt babies or lose goverment support. According to polls, it’s a close and an emotion filled competition between those who support gay marriage and those who want to maintain the traditional.
Living a traditional life myself, you’d think it wouldn’t be too much trouble for me to head into battle. We’ve been asked to embark on weekend walks around our neighborhoods polling voters and handing out literature in support of Prop 8 to undecideds. There are also phone calls to be made and signs and bumper stickers to display. Both Jeff and I have done our walking as we’ve been asked. Yesterday I went on my own to a ritzy neighborhood in Scripps Ranch. To preparation myself and pump myself up, I listened to “Enter Sandman” by Metallica on the ride up. I was ready. I felt happy to do my duty marching door to door even when an old lady with hot pink lipstick slammed the door in my face. Most people were pleasant and accepted my literature. But as I drove home, I felt sad. Those of you who know me know that I’d rather die than hurt anyone’s feelings. I so hate having my feelings hurt so I feel heinous in the event that I find that I’ve hurt someone else’s.
Personally, I don’t understand the draw to homosexual lifestyles but I’m humble enough to know I don’t understand a whole heck of lot in this world. Many of these people may very well be born with a tendency for same sex attraction and are living the best way they know how. How do I know? I also know that there are some wonderful and kind individuals who are gay. Therefore, I try not to judge others too harshly and in order to avoid hurting of feelings, I am accepting. The Prop 8 situation puts me in the precarious position of working to promote a proposition that I totally believe in, but at the same time tell someone else that they can’t have something that is a dream for them. How can one at once be accepting of gays but at the same time tell them that their dreams and hopes for fair opportunities are wrong? How can I say that what gay individuals do and hope for is wicked (there is a lot of comparing to Sodom and Gomorrah at church), but at the same time be kind and loving and avoid hurting their feelings? We've been told that one of the first steps to embracing a lifestyle is accepting it so I know I need to be careful.
This is a hard one for me. I will continue to do as I’m asked because I follow the First Presidency to the letter. I know where their commands come from. I hope that over the next few weeks as I am marching around neighborhoods, I can come to terms with this within myself.
7 comments:
I totally understand your conflict. It must be really hard to be in the middle of that fight. You are doing the right thing by following our leaders counsel. You are awesome.
Very well written! I have been blogging about this in my head all week.
I am so glad I'm not there right now. Just because I would have hated marching from door to door. However, I am glad I am still a California voter! I'm proud of you for doing the right thing!
First, you don't need to feel bad about feeling like people are nice but you disagree with their lifestyle. It is ok to judge behavior and not the person. Also, let me tell you that marriage is not a dream for them, it's just a step in a long plan for getting society to accept all sorts of deviant behavior. I know it sometimes seems harmless, but it really isn't, and most people living that lifestyle have no interest in marriage except as a political stand. Do you get the Standard of Liberty emails? You can read all about why it is more than just equality for them.
That said, what you are doing is hard and I would have a dilemma too, as strongly as I feel about it. I can't believe you got out and did your door-to-door! Way to go. I probably would have made excuses. I think you are doing awesome. And believe me, I know how it feels to be on the unpopular end of things, but there are people out there who agree with you (most of the people, actually), even if it seems you are alone.
Hey again, I just wanted to say that I really don't think the people that have an alternative lifestyle are "deviant." I think to them it is their truth and totally ok to them because they don't know any different and were not raised like us. If they were born with those tendencies and nobody had taught them it was wrong then why wouldn't they go with the flow? So while I don't agree with the lifestyle and while I support Prop 8 I still respect others beliefs because they don't have the same knowns as us. Just my opinion. Sorry if I offend anyone.
Tammy, would you consider pedophilia to be a deviant lifestyle? There are plenty who call that an alternative lifestyle. THESE are the kinds of things I mean when I say deviant. People are obviously free to choose whatever lifestyle they want to live as long as it does not hurt others. Unfortunately, radical sexual activism IS hurting others in many ways, politically, morally, and physically.
It's all good. I just don't see it that same way. I love hearing others opinions though. :) That said I do see the reasons why we don't want same sex marriage. Haha, Melissa sorry this is a now a political forum. I am not even polital to begin with. How ironic.
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