In the Midst of Affliction

I love the song, "The Lord is My Shepherd." My favorite lines have always been, "In the midst of affliction, my table is spread. With blessings unmeasured, my cup runneth over." It is so true in my life.

There was a nasty experience on Friday. My sister Kelly and my mom share a birthday. Kelly was here and wanted to call Mom to wish her a happy birthday. She dialed the rest home and asked for Mom. I watched as her face sort of turned white and her lips twisted down in a worried pout, indicating Mom was on the line. She kept saying, "Mom..." Finally she put Mom on speaker phone. We all heard hideous crying accompanied by moans, wails, and incoherent words. I could only interpret that those cries came from a deep place of bitter suffering. I took the phone and kept saying, "Mom, this is Missy. Please don't cry." She would stop and say, "Missy?" and listen. I think I even heard her mumble, "ok." But then the crying would start again.

After we hung up the phone, Kelly said she had to make herself numb but I couldn't do that. I kept hearing the crying and it turned me cold. I was jealous of those whose mother's were already dead because at least they were not suffering. They can even be angels and watch over them. I hate this place where Mom is; it's not any kind of life but certainly not yet death.

With this going on in the background, I received an e-mail from Elder Hoffmann's mother. I hope she doesn't mind me sharing. She's the mother of an Elder in our ward and is from Lindon. We had the special experience of meeting her and the rest of this Elder's family when we were visiting Utah last month. She had contacted me and asked if it would be ok if she went and visited my mother. She said she would like to tell my mother what a wonderful daughter she had. True to her word, she reported back to me that she had made the visit and given mom repeated hugs (my mom loves hugs) in my behalf. While reading that e-mail, I felt that somehow, though in San Diego, I could vicariously experience those hugs. That meant so much to me because, as mentioned, it's hard to talk to my mom on the phone and I doubt letters could be appreciated.

I had another amazing experience just tonight. I opened my e-mail to find a note from an old high school friend. I don't mean she's old but just that we hadn't kept in touch after high school until we found each other again on Facebook. She said she had a dream last night where my mom was with her and gave her a message for me. I won't say the details because it is a private experience. She hasn't even met my mom. I was so touched that she would be thinking about me and have this dream and then share it with me.

These two individuals, one of whom I just met and the other who I just reconnected with, have carried my burden and made it light. I feel God's love and care through their actions. I am so lucky to know such wonderful people, both of whom I wouldn't hesitate to classify as angels.