This President Monson talk (yes still going with it) has me thinking about happiness. I need to tend to my secret garden of gratitude more often.
Like most people, I tend to get depressed on occasion. It’s funny but I like to blame something on why I feel unhappy and the scapegoat is almost always my lack of involved parents. The thought process goes something unattractively like this, “if I just had a loving, caring parent to talk with about this or that… life wouldn’t be so hard.” I recently found out something that blew me out of self pity. One of Jeff’s friends was raised by a single mother addicted to drugs. When this friend was a little girl, the mom would leave her in the car late at night at different locations and tell her that evil spirits lived in the fog and they would get her if she opened the door. This is one example of the constant neglect and abuse this friend was exposed to as a child. The amazing thing is that this friend is a beautiful, happy, stable individual who just recently married a great guy and is having a wonderful life. What an example of choosing happiness for oneself despite the unhappy choices made by a parent.
My kids are great examples of happiness. They seem to wake up in joyful energy. No matter where we are or what we are doing, they find something to enjoy. At Costco they have so much fun eating snacks and handing the receipt to the exit employees. They savor making cookies, reading books, or running around outside in their diapers and underwear. That last one I doubt I'll try (too many neighbors). Even bad moods are fairly short lived because a good nap or decent dinner usually solves the problem. I heard Nicky’s prayers tonight and it may be the key to her secret. She didn’t ask for anything in her prayer but just said how she was thankful for Mommy, Daddy, Andy, the dinner, her animals (I think she named them all), and going to the park. Right before she went to sleep she said, “Mommy, I just love my little dogs so much.” It was such a simple thing but the joy in the room was tangible. Gratitude must be the key.
Along these lines, I am going to start keeping my gratitude journal again. I started it last year and every day would write something that I was grateful for during the day. Over time it showed me that on my scale of life, blessings were heavy in my favor. Life has been noticeably less happy when I’ve neglected this journal. Since President Monson’s talk, my goal is to pick this writing up again and enjoy my family with new enthusiasm. I don’t want to take one day for granted as I know life is precious, fragile and passes so fast.
6 comments:
I am almost glad to know that you have those low times too. I had no idea. You always look so happy and perfect.
I was having an interesting conversation with my sister-in-law the other day. She wrote the "Pirates" article in September Friend and many others. She is studying about happiness and joy for another article. She said "Happiness" is something you choose to have. On the other hand, "Joy" is God given. And you receive it through the Holy Ghost. In third Nephi where Jesus comes down to meet the people after the big destruction, those people were filled with joy. Although they just saw terrible destruction where lots of people died and all, God gave them joy and they felt it.
We can pray and ask to feel "Joy" in our lives and make sure we have the companionship of the Holy Ghost so we can receive it.
I had never thought of it that way.
I have had those same thoughts before. If only I could really turn to a parent for advice. I look at those that have that and I am a little envious.
I then remind myself that I am stronger because I have had to figure many things out on my own. Then I try to remind myself that I will be that for my own kids.
I think I will start a graditude journal too.
I think it is so cool that Marie's sister-in-law gets to write articles for the Friend. I, too, am seeking ways to find joy and happiness in every day things. I felt like Pres. Monson was talking specifically to me in conference and I am trying to not let myself get so down. Thanks for the reminder!
SO good to read this post! I'm going to start a gratitude journal. It's definately something I need to work on.
Yeah I think everyone has something they feel is lacking even though it is all different. Some want loving parents, some yearn for close friends and social outlets, some want a spouse, and others have challenging children, while some want finanacial stability. If we get in a cycle that "I will be happy when...." then we will always be waiting. I really try to be happy for the now and enjoy all the small things. We are pretty lucky really.
the underwear thing totally made me laugh! During my most difficult time on my mission I requested a blessing from my mission pres and totally expected him to bless me with gift of tongues or something along those lines. Instead I was counseled to express my gratitude everyday to my Father in Heaven. I thought, "that's it? You've got to be kidding me." But being desperate, I followed the counsel and well it worked! It really is amazing. I need to pick up my own gratitude journal again. It's amazing how easy it is to get out of the habit of gratitude!
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