June Gloom

I've really been waiting to post so as not to bore myself with another complaining write-up about how we have nowhere to live. However, I'm starting to wonder what I should do at night when I can't sleep (because I have nowhere to live) if I'm restricted from taking to my blog. Since we've been unsuccessful in finding a house, here are the three equally fun choices in a nutshell:

1. Move to Sacramento and rent until we find a place. This entails moving somewhere random while being pregnant with a possibly high risk pregnancy and having no friends or family close by. Also must select new doctor, hospital, pediatrician, etc. for possible high risk pregnancy with no friends or family for trustworthy referral.

2. Rent a month to month apartment in San Diego and search for homes over the Internet. Cheapest option. Clears up problem of finding doctor and hospital since I am comfortable with both here. However, we probably will end up moving wards and be the new family for 6 months to a year. I still have a friend or two that may see me from my old neighborhood so I am not totally desolate. But then I cry thinking of moving to an apartment. This is all turning out to be so backwards!

3. Rent house in our neighborhood and ward for more money than we can afford and get stuck in year contract. Still try to buy house in Sacramento but rent it out until our contract over. Rates high on my own comfortablity factor since I have friends and ward I love. Would be nice to have a house. But rates low on Jeff's comfortability factor since it sickens him to be paying someone else's mortgage when it is our goal to pay our own. Also we both feel it is a bad idea to take from savings to pay rent.

So there you have the reasons why my mood is lousy. I don't do well with change and a pregnancy anyway. I have been the new person in the ward the other two times I've had a baby. Also, with living in California, I am far from my family and we are still pretty far from Jeff's. It brings up my lack of mother issue badly. I can only liken not being able to call and celebrate with her after a baby like graduating from college and having nobody show up to graduation. So I think that is why I just wished this time to have my friends and ward near (since I've latched on to them like surrogates). Or, I can just cry. That works too.

It's not all bad and I know that. Jeff has a job and it's not like we are really going to be homeless. I just have issues with being new and friendless. I know it. I probably need counseling. But I've written it for public scrutiny instead. There you have it. The price of living in paradise in cheap housing for 3 1/2 years!

Below are cute pictures of the kids in Palm Springs. We took a fun overnight trip to escape the June gloom in the San Diego sky and in our hearts. Rooms were cheap at this resort (since it's hotter than hell this time of year). There were water slides and a lazy river. We gave ice cream to stop the kids from fighting in the car during the two hour drive up and everyone had a great time in the pool.